Why do men who treat their wives really special resort to on-line dating & skin sites?
If you know he is and all you wanted was for him to be honest why won’t he confess up about internet activities? Why is he taking every precaution to hide files that won’t open and get special software and extra hard drive to hide it? Does he really think she will get ever get past it if he doesn’t stop? I am ready to divorce him! It has hurt me so bad and I cried for 2 weeks without stopping. We used to have so much fun and now I don’t respect him and I don’t even like him. I used to love him very much. Doesn’t he know that he is a fool for believing crap that some people say over the internet? I have where IM was installed and photography software is installed and he still denies it. I am getting my own checking account and I am taking his name off all my cards. I don’t want to get stuck with his bills if he gets crazy enough to leave. Please- any suggestions? I have never cheated and I was good to him.
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Tags: cards, checking account, crap, Dating Sites, divorce, fool, hard drive, Hide Files, internet activities, love, photography software, Precaution, special software
If your spouse is looking at pictures online and doing online dating, etc, then he is in a sense cheating on you, maybe not physically, but mentally and emotionally. He is sharing and communicating things with others that are not his spouse. This is adulterous activity. If he would not accept it from you, then it is also wrong for him to do as such.
One place that I can suggest you check out is Setting Captives Free. They offer a free course online that deals with spouses who have those who have sexual addictions: pornography, adultery, etc. The course is called United Front. Even if your spouse will not sign up to break free from this addiction/sin, then they can at least provide guidelines and ways for you to overcome and seek out what you truly want to do and also give insight as to why he might be doing as such.
DO NOT allow others to come into your marriage. You married your husband, not your husband, and another party. Vows were made between you and your spouse. My prayers will be with you.
They are treating their wives nice as a cover-up
wow!! powerful stuff .. listen its not uncommon for men to slap around the meat on the net to porno… there looking at thing that they fantasize about.. maybe you as the wife should try new things in the bed room let him do anal sex if he wishes ..have threesomes ..join the sexual behavior.. you need to do your part.. to make him happy.. your husband met you didn’t he? if he wasn’t looking then he wouldn’t have looked at you… just because the guys a pervert you think your better off with out him?? then what ..are you going to find a new guy that doesn’t spank the monkey to porno? but just thinks it?? or are you going to get int his head and read his mind before you date a new guy again?? the choice is yours listen.. its NORMAL behavior
Some men are sexually addicted to pornography. It doesn’t diminish his love for you but can certainly ruin your marriage and with good reason. He is using the energy he could be using on you to feed this addiction.
He hides it because he feels guilty and because he knows you disapprove. My guess is he fears he will lose you (and is).
Look up "sexual addiction" on the web and see if you don’t recognize his behavior. You should find help under the same key words. It is likely time for an ultimatum. Do be prepared to follow through with it once stated but it’s just possible that with help and your understanding but firm support that he could actually beat it. Many men have.
You say you don’t love him and you want a divorce but it seems that is not what you really want is it? Find it in your heart to forgive him whether you stay or not. You did nothing wrong and I think that men do this stuff and it’s harmless as long as they don’t act on it. Is he going on dates? Has he had an affair? Make a final attempt before taking drastic measures. It sounds like you guys aren’t past the point of no return.
His Internet activities are not the issue, Lying is… What is he hiding, you know, in denial? sorry, seems to be true, maybe from a jaded perspective, yet you have the facts!!
Lying is lying. seems like you have made up your mind, it sucks and I am sorry that you have to go thru this, just leave, it will not get better until you do something drastic, NOT dramatic, just responsible and big! Get on with your life.. MOVE. take your stuff and go… yes it will hurt and be difficult. I know you have a lot invested in this relationship. yet once you have lost respect for him, how can you stay and have a healthy marriage/relationship. Maybe once you have let go and moved on he will realize and grow up, either way you have done what you have to to for you..
It could be that he is addicted. Addicts behave in similar ways and go to great lengths to satisfy their addictions, covering up evidence, etc. He knows you have a problem with it but he doesn’t want to face the consequences. It’s possible that you can’t change this just by talking to him yourself, especially if an addiction is what you’re dealing with. Can you continue to live like this? Do you want to seek a professional? It’s up to you to make a plan for your future. Securing your own finances is a good move regardless if you leave or stay right now because you need that safety net.